Overwhelmed? Five Ways to Take Back Your Life
Do you spend your energy worrying about everything you have to do instead of actually doing it? Has making dinner, picking up the dry cleaning, or responding to e-mails become a monumental effort? Is your to-do list growing at unmanageable rates?
Lately, I’ve been observing what happens when I find myself in this undesirable place. I noticed that when I start to feel overwhelmed, I go to great lengths to check off “just one more thing” from my to-do list. While this short burst of frenzied activity allows me to accomplish one thing, by the time I get to the second item, I’m totally exhausted.
So, I decided to try an experiment. For the last week, I tried to give into this stuck feeling; to surrender to it and to see what happens. When I slowed down, I noticed that the culprit was often unrealistic expectations of myself and my time.
When I started to have these unrealistic expectations of myself, it became easy to lose sight of why I committed to doing something in the first place. Once I became disconnected from the meaning behind my actions, it was easy to lose motivation. Losing motivation for one thing quickly snowballed into losing motivation for another thing, which contributed to an ever-growing to-do list and, eventually feeling overwhelmed.
Instead of giving into this frenzy, I decided to take some time to re-connect with what’s important to me—exercise, meditation, laughter, and fun. Now I’m in the process of figuring out how to incorporate these into my everyday life.
So, when you’re overwhelmed, instead of trying to get as much done as quickly as you can, try slowing down to get re-connected with the meaning behind your actions. Try a few of these exercises to help you slow down:
- As often as possible, stop for a moment and take several deep, relaxing breaths.
- Do something that you used to do as a child. Run through a sprinkler, swing on a swing-set, or draw a picture.
- Go outdoors for as long as it takes get perspective. Take time to notice the details of nature—look up at the clouds, smell the grass, snow or rain, and feel the fresh air on your skin.
- Run up and down your stairs or do some jumping jacks or push-ups for 10 minutes. Explore how getting out of your mind and into your body helps you to feel both calm and energized.
- Watch a funny movie, or read a funny book. Laughter provides perspective and makes everything feel more manageable.
Spend a week trying these exercises, and then look for patterns. What do you notice? What are you learning? What is possible from here?
Write down what you learned, or share it with your coach.
The next time you’re feeling overwhelmed, try letting go of your expectations and measuring your accomplishments. Instead, focus on slowing down and re-connecting with what energizes and feeds you. When you’re connected with your values and the guiding principles of your life, you’re connected to the natural fuel for getting things done.
Ditch Your New Year’s Resolutions
A New Year is upon us. The stresses of Christmas will soon be over, and we’ll be bursting with good intentions to lose weight, pay off debts, get fit, drink less alcohol, and be nicer to the mother-in-law. Sound familiar? Then read on!
The truth is that most of us set ourselves up for failure when it comes to New Year’s Resolutions because a) our lists are too long, and b) they’re simply not exciting enough!
That’s why I recommend you ditch your New Year’s Resolutions altogether. Not only is it the most liberating feeling, you’ll also avoid the massive guilt trip that comes from setting them, starting them, slipping up on them, and then stopping them all in the space of two weeks!
Instead, why not focus on “One Big Gulp!” for the year. All you need to do is set one big goal that really excites you and challenges you, one that would feel like a major achievement (if not a life changing moment) once you’ve done it. Maybe you’ve always dreamed of running a marathon, or volunteering in a Guatemalan orphanage, or trekking the Himalayas. Or maybe you’ve had a deep yearning to start your own business, or relocate to Spain, or completely change your career direction. Or maybe it’s time to make a big decision about a relationship, your health, or where you live. Put a stake in the ground and make 2008 the year you stop dithering and actually make it happen.
Here is my 3 step plan for setting your One Big Gulp! for 2008
Step 1: Make It Exciting
Your One Big Gulp! needs to make your heart flutter with anticipation (even if your stomach is quivering with nerves!). Spend a couple of hours in early January doing some soul searching. Reflect upon what’s missing in your life, and think about what’s truly important to you. Then pick one big goal that feels really exciting and scary at the same time. Write this down on a Post-It note, and put it where you can see it every day.
Step 2: C.I.G.A.R. It
Big ideas can be overwhelming so “chunk it down.” Start by looking at your Current situation; then shape your Ideal situation. Write down the Gaps between where you are today and where you want to be, and then draw up your Action plan. Finally, put some checks in place to Review your progress over the coming months. (C.I.G.A.R = Current, Ideal, Gaps, Action, Review).
Step 3: Take Small Steps—Every Day
In the words of St. Francis of Assisi, “Start by doing what’s necessary and then what’s possible, and very soon you’re doing the impossible.” Taking small daily actions is easy, and very soon they’ll accumulate into big shifts. Buddy up with a friend, and surround yourself with people who support you. And before you know it, you’ll be doing the impossible.
To help you stay motivated and on track this New Year, sign up for your FREE downloadable One Big Gulp! Kit, including a 25 page eWorkbook, daily motivational emails for 30 days, weekly podcasts, and details about our interactive Facebook community. Visit www.onebiggulp.com
Gain Control over Holiday Stress
The holiday season is upon us. Does that statement make you jump for joy or wish you could hide under the covers for the next month or so? Holiday stress is an unwelcome visitor that plagues far too many people each year. By understanding some of the reasons we experience this type of stress and arming ourselves with some tools to minimize it, the holidays can and should be a joyous time of year.
Of course some of the very things that make us enjoy the holiday season also seem to provoke stress. Schedules become busier than normal with holiday parties, shopping, and special activities. Hectic schedules often squeeze out normal exercise routines, and office parties often make it difficult to stick with a normal healthy eating plan.
Other factors that invariably have an impact on holiday stress levels include the stretched budgets many of us face. Overspending on holiday gifts, food, and decorations is common and easy to do. Many people put a lot of pressure on themselves to have the perfect holiday celebration and spend a lot of time and money hoping to achieve perfection. All of these factors can add up to extreme holiday stress.
If you find yourself with a lot on your plate this holiday season, take a moment to recognize if you’re experiencing any stress-related symptoms. Fatigue, moodiness, lack of energy, or lack of motivation can all be signs that you’re experiencing stress. In addition, you may also experience headaches or body aches due to changes in your sleep, exercise, and eating routines. Address these stress signals right away so you can regain control and enjoy the holiday season.
Once you have recognized that you are suffering from holiday stress, you will be in a much better position to deal with it. The first thing to do is gain control of the situation. You have many choices during each day, and how you choose to take on the various tasks at hand will determine the level of stress you will ultimately experience.
One of the most important choices you can make each day is to dedicate some time to yourself. You must decide to take some isolated time to relax. Relaxing means different things to different people, so you will need to understand what it means to you. It might mean going for a peaceful walk, reading a book, or just sitting still. The actual activity you choose to do is not important, but the fact that you take the time to clear your mind and do something enjoyable is the key.
With a clear mind, you will be better focused and ready to do some planning. By taking a few moments to plan both the big-picture events, such as holiday dinner party or office gift exchange, as well as the individual steps you will need to take each day to accomplish the events, you will be setting yourself up for success and alleviating a lot of stress at the same time. Every evening should have a few minutes set aside for planning the next day’s tasks. You’ll be better able to get a good night’s rest, which will provide more energy the next day.
Try to stick with your normal exercise and healthy eating routines as much as possible. Of course it will be difficult and you may need to shorten some workouts, but whatever you can do will payoff in terms of increased energy and reduced stress levels. And even though there will be more goodies in the diet, by including as many of the normal healthy foods as possible, you will be able to maintain higher energy levels and feel better.
While holiday stress may always play a role in the holiday season, it doesnt have to be the star. With a little strategic planning, you can spend more of your holiday season enjoying yourself with family and friends and less time stressing over the details.
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